|A typical English schoolboy or puce faced comedy posh wanker...?|
- Feral haircuts and sprouting bumfluff.
- Spots based on value packs no-brand biscuits, fizzy pop masquerading as breakfast / lunch / dinner
- Scratchy and itchy - based on aforementioned junk diet and putridly poor hygiene.
- Perpetual erectile discomfort caused by being congenitally teenage and consuming copious amounts of specialist one handed material on the net at 3.00 am...it was in The Mail so it must be true
- Repulsive gag inducing odour of seeping sweat (see all of the above)
- Add captio
- Repulsive gag and reflux inducing use of industrial pollutant Lynx to fail to mask aforementioned suppurating seeping sweat.
- Excellence in the manufacture of fast flying sharp nosed model planes
- Thumping one another hard to cover up sexual identity confusion
- Olympic standards in non-syllabic communication
- Creative insults (your mum, gay, wankah etc)
- Insecure homophobic comments (are there secure ones?)
- Great skills at sopping spit balling
- Disrespectful of teachers, parent(s), alleged friends, and self
- Hates foreigners - despite one in five (or something) being part - 'foreign' and trying to sound Gangsta.
Education? Why bother? There are so few - even shittily paid - jobs at the end of it all anyway?
Sleepy part of Gulf (but only in all boys classes)
- Fidgety - which they cannot ever be among girls who inspire all sorts of evil and depravity and must therefore be covered up
- Scratchy (surreptitious fear ridden comedy stiffies being constantly slapped down as they don't go with pre-medieval nonsense belief systems)
- Beautiful moulded, hair and sculpted trimmed beards showing a careful balance of machismo and religious devotion and piety.
- Clear skin based on plenty of fruit and veg owing to a sad lack of value brands
- Excellent mosque and religious based personal hygiene hammered home by fear of relgious damnation and death by slow spit roasting for the teensiest morsel of stray and bedraggled toe jam
- As there is rightly a fatwa banning Lynx our boys use lots of musk and frankincense based oils and skin fresheners. Nice it is too.
- Shit at anything kineshetic creative subjects are not taught as they get in the way of religious devotion...
- Never violent or touchy ... in class anyway.
- Mono-syllabic and unfailingly polite in English as teachers are hugely venerated objects of respect placed upon gleaming sun flecked pedestals of marble and gold.
- Creative insults in Arabic (not that I can understand and they won't tell me but I suspect your mum is NOT in the repertoire)
- Attitude to LGBT? Stone to death and get a few virgins in reward
- (Question I have yet to ask my Omani friends - what if the virgins are boys?)
- What's a spit ball?
- Foreigners? Ah yes, horrid poor people with their ...oh hang on they do all the hard, unpaid dirty dangerous frequently life threatening work don't they? Also mainly brother Muslims who do it. Just saying...
- Westerners - Indian whisky and Filipina sex workers. Confused feelings of either jealousy or hatred or both.
Education? Why bother I'll get a cushy government job with a big house and pension as the unelected government needs to keep us all onside to avoid a Syria style spring.