The cheesy bling infested uber Essex of the Gulf - Blue Water with planes attached. Buy a lottery ticket (add nationality to stop non-UAE folk from winning....probably) and win a huge V8 blacked out Toyota Turbo Earthraper to go with the other ten you already have. That kind of place. Aspirational and extremely classy.
|Building the Gulf States' dream on bugger all a day in 45 degree heat|
Well, you know, hordes of armed on-the-edge cops in too tight shirts sporting the gay para-military look protecting hordes of us from the bad guys (maybe sponsored by our pals in the UAE, Saudi or Qatar) who would otherwise be doing badness in extreme abundance according to the Daily Mail, The Sun and their friends in GCHQ which makes it all absolutely true of course.
|Travelling in style|
|Typical hand luggage|
Friendly and small but no place for a lengthy stopover unless you have time for a trip to the water village. As of the last time I had to go through there - no bar and only brightly coloured sugary drinks on offer.
|Water Village - really good for a long stopover|
|Crap to buy someone you don't really like|
Too well hidden bar / restaurant / shower area which can only be entered if the nostril flaring harridans from Hades on the door let you through crap night-club style.
|'How much for the World Cup, Sepp...?'|
7. Abu Dhabi (See Dubai for pic)
Bags lost in transit on more than one occasion by Etihad among whose staff I am sure there are no Emiratis well aside who those who collect the large amounts of profit. Interminable prayers which don't disguise its primary purpose which is to extract as much cash from you as possible 'cos shopping is why you go to the UAE apparently. (See Dubai)
|Airports as they should be|